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Everything posted by an_inhaler
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Hello dear! I'm sure you can get over this! I absolutely love my tattoo now, and I've gotten two more since then (I plan to get many more) and I love them all, even the one that is not very well done 😀 It might sound cliche, but what really helped me in the beginning with my anxiety were meditations. My anxiety was mostly about how I will be perceived by others (or my future self) with my tattoo, so I would remind myself why I got that tattoo in the first place, that it is a part on my self-expression and I am radiant, powerful, and confident, I go my own way and stay true to myself, and my tattoo is a part of it. If you manage to really tap into this feeling (or whatever else resonates with you), and sit in it for 10 minutes, it can be very powerful. It also helped me to keep being aware that this anxiety is probably some protective/adaptive mechanism in-built in my mind, and even though all the stories my brain tells me about how my tattoo will ruin my life might seems quite real in the moment, they are not very probable. I was even worried about completely nonsensical hypothetical situations like some dictator ruling my country and forbidding tattoos and me having to cut my arm off. Seriously! 😂 Also, in the moment it helped me to research laser removal 😀 I was never seriously considering it, but again it was calming to know I have it as a back-up option if everything indeed turns out as bad as I imagined. So yeah, now I love my tattoos but also they are not such a big deal anymore -- they're just a part of me, like my hair and my moles and whatever else. For you. it's just a very new part for now, and you need some time to accept and get used to it.
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Cmon people, this thread was aimed to help people going through some tattoo-related anxiety, and your personal opinions or statistics about the use of tranquillisers are completely irrelevant here and not helpful at all. I don't agree with someone saying later don't get any more tattoos. I had terrible anxiety after my first tattoo and less severe ones about my next two, and I am still happy I've got them and I will definitely get more. Anxiety is not rational, and researching your options about laser removal doesn't come from the real wish to get rid of a tattoo but is just a way to come down your mind and see that there are safety nets available in the worst case scenario. Some people don't have this tattoo-related anxiety at all, but in my opinion it is strongly correlated with your general mental state and how prone to anxiety your are. For me, anxiety is my mind's natural response to changes, and I am very happy I am strong enough to make those changes despite that.
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The tattoo is awesome and it looks very beautiful on your hand! I'm sure you'll be able to fully appreciate it as well once your anxiety is gone. This weird feeling will definitely pass. As about your anxiety being about something else: I of course can't tell if there are any specific underlying psychological issues for you, but as I myself have learned from therapy and self-reflection, our brains are in general not so good with changes. We are programmed to stay as safe as possible in our comfort zone, and any change requires adaptation. Some people can deal with changes more easily, and for some they trigger huge waves of anxiety (even if we that change is something that we really wanted, it is still new and unknown and therefore outside of our comfort zone). With such a visible tattoo I can suggest you have to face this change constantly and you get triggered into anxiety a lot. So just give your mind some time to adjust and in the meantime remind yourself that it indeed will pass.
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I will also give you guys an update on how things have been going on since that first post I wrote here 4 years ago. I was a huge help for me to get support here and maybe it'll be an inspiration for someone else to see how all the anxiety fades away with time. I LOVE my tattoo. I've got two more since then: one pretty big one on my chest (beautiful blooming flowers) and a smaller one on my back. None of them is perfect, and I love them all completely. I've never had any problems at work (in the university) and if anything it only makes my students more interested in me and my courses :). I've never received any negative comments about my tattoos anywhere actually, and they just help me to discover and embrace my true self, which has already brought me to the most beautiful places in life. I am much more fulfilled with my life now than I was 4 years ago and the first tattoo was one of the first steps out of the life that I didn't enjoy. Now I just want to get more of course. Hugs xx
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It's beautiful! But you know it anyway since you know your feelings are not based on reality. To give you some comfort, my anxiety passed quite quickly. Now, two and a half years ago, I fully love my tattoo and it makes me feel so much better in my body. It's a beautiful part of me now and I can't imagine I just had a bare arm once :). I even got a second big tattoo right on my chest from a different artist. I didn't have the same anxiety right away but a couple of months after getting it I was going through a difficult period so it hit me. Now I just realize it's like that for me with all big changes: I might want it, I might like it, but it is still going outside my comfort zone, so anxiety is natural and it just takes time to accept these things as a part of your new comfort zone. Hope it happens soon for you, my inked buddy! In the meantime, getting support from the community reeeaaaaaaaally helps :).
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Hi Emily! Your tattoo is beautiful! I also got my first one and joined the forum recently, and I am also very happy about finding this place because I have absolutely no one with any interested in tattoos among my friends. Welcome!
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@Lucy83, I am in Leiden, and I only moved to the Netherlands a year ago, so I didn't even now where Den Bosch is before I looked it up
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Thanks, @El Dolmago! I am worrying less about this now. But I was really surprised to find out that sometimes students give bad evaluations to their professors because of the tattoos. Seriously, guys?
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Yes, I don't think there are a lot of people with tattoos in the Netherlands. Where do you live here, @Lucy83?
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Hi @PinkUnicorn, I live in the Netherlands now, which is probably the most tolerant country in general. I work in a very international environment now. But I have no idea where I will be in 3 years when my current contract will be over (I do not have a European passport so I won't be able to stay unless I have a job).
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I agree, I would not expect any negative attitude towards tattoos in academia, that's why I didn't even think about that before getting one. After that, I started thinking about all possible negative consequences of that (literally ALL, you cannot even imagine what crazy thoughts were in my head). And on one website I read somebody saying that it is a very bad idea to get a big visible tattoo if you are a university teacher. And some woman working in academia wrote in her blog that if somebody is not going to hire her because of her tattoos, then maybe it is not a place for her anyway. So, I thought, there might be this problem! Being in a very fragile state of mind, I over-generalized it of course. That is what I often tend to do: focus on some negative possibilities that are only in my head and worrying worrying worrying about them. So yes, I have some anxiety issues in general. The transition to being a tattooed person for some reasons for me was much harder than I could expect it to be, and it magnified all my worries. I've also had some kind of a personality crisis recently, it doesn't help either. But I am so much better now already, especially during the day time. Mornings and evenings seem to be difficult times in this respect for me. I am starting to accept my new look and I like it very much. Thank you for your support a lot, people! I hope that soon I'll stop whining here for good.
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Thanks a lot, @Gingerninja! Compliments help too =)
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I completely agree: do it if you want it. All the things have different meanings for different people. Math does not make me feel ill and I also find the Platonic solids fascinating although I don't know a thing about them =). So I would absolutely love your tattoo! And you have more than enough reasons to have polyhedra on you.
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Yes, I think it has even more meaning for me than I initially realized. And it being on my arm is the biggest problem: it is too visible both for me and for the people around. But from the very beginning, I wanted it to be visible for me and I didn't care much for the people around (until I actually got the tattoo and started reading on the internet how tattoos are perceived in the academic world. It was a bad idea, don't ever do it!). But the community here is amazing and I am very glad I am a part of it now!
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Thanks, @Makar! I do like my tattoo. It makes me very happy when I am not panicking =). Then I just remember why I did it and it al makes sense. It is just so very new for me. It's been only a week! It is also itchy now so I am constantly paying attention to it. I think it will also be better when it heals completely.
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I wonder if there are any people who couldn't ever overcome this feeling
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Thanks, guys! @Lucy83, yes, I think that it holds for me too. I still cannot believe that this thing is actually ON me. Looking at it in the mirror or in the photo is definitely easy than looking at it directly. @el twe, here is my tattoo. It is on my userpic as well. The photo was taken by the artist right after the tattooing. I think it is beautiful and magical but oooooh it is much bigger than I thought it would be. In general, I think I am starting to feel a little bit better now. At least I do not wake up in the middle of the night. Now it is just these panic attacks in the morning and in the evening =). I feel very silly because of all that.
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Exactly. Thanks. I like it here.
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A tip for all the future panicking readers: meditation helps! Just put on the first 18 hours of relaxing music and shit from youtube and breath for 8 minutes. Brings you back to the present. Phew, it feels good. I probably need to do it at least 10 times per day now. As @Hands On said, That is so true. Do you know me? =) Yeah, what's done is done, I am enjoying it and I am ready for the journey. oh my god I am unstable
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Thanks for your support and welcoming, everyone! Unfortunately, it hasn't become better. If anything, it has just become worst. Maybe I just don't have what it takes. maybe the tattoo is too big and visible for the first one. But now I am just panicking all the time and I cannot really understand why =). This morning it is not about what other people will think but about the eternity the tattoo will be with me. I really hope I can get used to it, otherwise it will just drive me crazy. On the bright side -- I am absolutely not worrying about all the thing I worries before getting a tattoo. Mind-blowing experience, anyway. That is really stupid and I just wish I could enjoy my beautiful tattoo. But guys your words do help!
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Hi there guys! So, I am 24, I work at a university and I made my first tattoo five days ago. Now I am one of you. I absolutely love my tattoo and I think that it's just marvelous. I like it when I am looking at it, I like it when I am looking at myself in the mirror, I like the design and the job that the artist did. My husband loves it, my mom was not angry (didn't tell the rest of the family yet, it's too scary). But.. sometimes I really think I made a mistake. I understand it is not a therapy forum, but the words you guys told to other people with the same problem are just so helpful. Well, most of the time. I am waking up in the middle of the night and just wish it wouldn't be there. I am afraid of what my colleagues will think and how it can affect my career. It is a constant tsunami inside of me. The tricky part is: I couldn't even imagine it would be an issue before doing that! I am not usually that kind of person. But your forum really helps. It is nice to see that I am not the only one with this thing during the first days. I do not have anyone with visible tattoos among my friends or colleagues, so it really helps to see that there are many many many beautiful people with tattoos all around the world. To sum up: the first tattoo is very very very scary, but I can't wait for all the magic it is going to bring into my life.