tattoojeff

I for one dont think that its age. over the years of tattooing people, and im sure many will agree that. it seems like when the biggest badest looking young buck comes for ink. alot of the times its a young healthy man. who turns out to be the biggest pain in the ass. needs a smoke break, then bathroom, then a drink of water etc. i remember after a session from hell that taxed a massive amount of extra time. i sat down with a clip board and pencil. trying to crack the code. so i could spot these people before hand. so the price will be right for the time. this was 20 years ago. i may have failed figuring that out. but i wrote a poem that most tattooers dig. its called tough customer, and i submitted it online to a contest and won a real nice plaque w/ silver engraved etc. TOUGH CUSTOMER This tough acting dude walks into my place, telling tall tails, like he was an ace. i want a tattoo, all black and real big. the small ones look wimpy, but the big ones i dig. I been every where, ive done every thing, when i come to town, all the bitches would cream. cuz im big and im burley, and talented too. but if you believe that. then you dont have a clue. cuz when he was finished,... the talkin part done. he flinched like a bitch, when i fired my gun. when he turned to look. his face was all geen. i laughed to myself, and thought oh yeah, you mean. his sweat was a flowing, his jockies were wet. he was singing the blues fo his home you can bet. but we made a deal. and the cash was up front. so when he weenied out. i told him real blunt. when you want a tattoo. you must be the man. grit your teeth or do what you can. but since you cant take it and act like you should. two quarter inch lines never paid so good. jeff etzel

theres a big rave at the speedway, in las vegas. it last three days. lots of people in town. Had a decent nite. Came in this morning started straighting stuff out, and opening up. I see an old sheet of notebook papper folded over. Worn out. Sombody obviously carried it around with them. Me and the shop owner Dan was laughin our asses off. Cuz we found the holy grail for hookers. And its just showes the rawness of vegas, Were we are any way. I thought id share a alittle of it. And am curious if its crazy, funny to anyone else.. here it goes the direct tv guy from the wynn is big$$$. aria ( circle bar near cashier) ceasars-#1 shadow bar- #2( front piano bar). palms- hardrock- mirage- treasure island- ballys- paris-. Stay around the bar to see if the tricks are drinking. be on the lookout for square toed shoes. With button up shirt. And are pressing you for a date. Dont be afraid to take a sip of there drink. (make sure theres alcohol in it.) Or the UFC vice groups with the bald heads and go-tee and tennis shoes. *Basically follow instincts* DO NOT GO TO: Bellagio- mgm- mandalay bay-planet hollywood. *STAY AWAY FROM NIGGAS!* *Start at $500.00, negotiate to $400.00, OK my minimum is $300.00* *Start by getting towell and lotion... put lotion in the rubber. put it on with hand job- esculater, trick fuck. *MONEY FIRST* *BE IN CHARGE* *USE BEST JUDGEMENT* *PARTIERS ARE EASY (COKE DICK).* *WHEN YOU GO HOME. ALWAYS TAKE A SHOWER!* I LOVE THIS TOWN!! TATTOO JEFF, ABSOLUTE INK. LAS VEGAS, NV.

Ok whats the difference between jesus christ, and mexicans........................................................................................................ ................................................................................................................................................................................................ jesus does'nt tattoo mexicans on himself.

i knew i would get a hit from some one about charlie. one old cool cat for sure.

i dont know the year, but a long time ago. i met goodtime charlie cartwright, in wichita kansas, at end of the trail tattoo shop. way before piercings were hip. he tattooed a dragon on my fore arm. i was locked in . he inspired me to be a tattoo artist. i never got a chance to thank him. what a great man.

I agree that lip tattoos are a joke and a pain. But i dont mind them as much since Dan Jackson showed me a trick. have the customer flip his own lip tight over a toung depresser. easier surrface to work with. and hammer it in.

Working at the shop on the vegas strip, its winter and bussiness is a little slower then normal. Im takeing everything that comes in. When this person. appox 6'8" ducks under the door. Obviously a man, with a ratty old wig, a set of boobs, an 8" stub were the left arm used to be. And one titanium leg were one was missing. I try my hardest to be the professional and not act shocked at this sight. I greeted the potential customer. Who said her name was rose in a deep voice. (which happens to be my ex wifes name.) So what are we looking to do today i said. I want a rose tattoo with sharp thorns, she says. ok sounds easy enough. Were would you like it? And in that deep voice she said. "ON MY BREAST". I thought to myself, Of coarse. And which one. She explained on the one that was by the mutilated 8" stub of an arm, that as she talks, Is flailling around with a mind of its own. Im ducking and bobbing trying to avoit it poking me. And again i thought . Of coarse. As im preparing a custum rose for her she says" SHOULD I JUST WHIP IT OUT"? As shes grabbing it to do so. WHOA WHOA WHOA. I said, Look im kind of a titt man, So how about i give you this dental bib to protect your clothing, And we will only expose what is absolutely nessecary. And please no nipple slips ok. The session was going good and faster then normal for sure. I was in the shop alone at the time. i wanted to be done and payed. And her gone before any of the other artist showed up. They would no dought never let me live that one down. Amazingly enough i pulled it of she left. And i never mentioned anything about that custumer to my coworkers. A week later, I finally got a day off. Three other artist were at the shop. I get a phone call from my boss. Who says hey you have return bussiness if you want it. Then after a short pause i hear" tee hee hee". what wait, what tee hee hee? and in a deep voice he says its "ITS ROSE". Omg wtf. as i walk in the shop my friend and great artist: Tommy hodges is standing in the backround, Standing on one leg and and pushing his chest up with one hand is licking his own nipple.....Trying to do another tattoo on rose. Who come to find out was a c.o. in the army for 10 years. Was tough with all the giggling and smerks. and when she left. (Another happy customer of coarse.) then all the bro derik, type jokes were relentless. So now when a new artist comes to the shop to work. Someone always explains that when a transvestight comes in. back off there here to see me.

gotta love it. i got one for you. there was a girl, she loved elvis. and allways wanted a portrait of him. she then did just that. on her upper thigh. upon looking at the finished product. she wasnt sure cuz. well she had an idea in her head of the finished product, and it was quite like that, not that the work was bad. just dfferent. so she gets a second opinion from another shops artist. and of coarse he talks bad about the piece and explains that when it comes to elvis portraits... he is the man. so she let him do his rendition on the other thigh. as she looked. it was different then the other one. but different then she thought it would look like....so she goes home to the ol man whos camped out in his chair drinking a beer. and she says while dropping her pants.. do you recognize either of these guys?........... the ol man says: i dont know about the guy on the right or the left. but the one in the middle is willie nelson.....