Relationships and tattoos

[gougetheeyes]

This may be a weird thread but what the hell. I've always been interested in people who are tattooed who are in a relationship with someone who is not tattooed at all. Unlikeyourown's feminism and tattoos thread got me thinking about this.

So a.) are you in one and have you been in one? b.) Have you thought about this or noticed a change in preference since you've gotten older..? and c.) do you feel like there would be any kind of disconnect there? It seems like such a personal thing as opposed to say, an interest in old typewriters, I wonder if it would make any difference at all. I'm guessing not, since I know people in these relationships.

When I was younger (and only had a few tattoos) I used to not be into girls with tattoos at all. Now I think I'd only be into tattooed ladies.. as evidenced by my tattooed future wife.

Does it ever make a difference? Anyone??

[hogg]

Funny you should post this, as I was just thinking about something similar this morning.

When I met my wife, I was tattooed, but just tattooed. I had half sleeves, a chest piece, a few things on my legs, etc. She didn't have any tattoos, but loved mine and eventually started getting tattooed herself. She's now about as tattooed as I was when we met.

Now, I'm heavily tattooed, and it occurred to me this morning that it would be weird if I were single and met someone who wasn't tattooed. (Obviously, that's not the only reason I'm glad I'm married!) I think that there's a line that gets crossed when one becomes heavily tattooed. I don't know of anyone with lots of coverage who's with someone who isn't tattooed. It just becomes such a big part of who you are that it's hard to imagine being with someone who isn't at least partially covered.

[WeRnDoG]

Good topic gouge. If I wasn't married to my beautiful wife I couldn't imagine myself with an untattooed woman, I just couldn't see how someone that showed little or no interest in tattoos could possibly understand a very big part of my life revolving around being tattooed and the culture. I am lucky that my wife loves traveling and getting tattooed as well, although I don't think she will ever have full sleeves she has some pretty cool pieces and ideas. She is also very lucky to be getting a half sleeve from Shige in Japan this coming April.

[apprentice1]

this is a good topic because I was in a relationship a couple of months ago with a beautiful girl who had no interest in tattoos whatsoever. tattoos though are a huge part of my life and future and her lack of interest in my passion was really disheartening. she came with me to start my half sleeve but i could see on her face that she was just really out of her comfort zone, and we ended up breaking up. my girlfriend before her though was quite heavily tattooed and we were really close because we had a common interest and something to talk about so yeah, i do think it makes a massive difference.

[Kenny Wilson]

Cool topic. Due to being a broke most of my life, it has taken a long time to get the tattoos I have. Just within the past year have I gone below the elbow and I always felt like I was in some position of neutrality. I was heavily tattooed to most average people, but compared to my heavily tattooed friends I was pretty normal looking. When I was young I would only date girls with tattoos and who were into underground music. These days I have been through some crappy relationships and I am a single dad. I have learned that I am more interested in what is in the girls heart than what is on her skin. I have a handful of ex's who are heavily tatttooed, but the current girl I am dating has no tattoos or piercings. I tell the ladies prior to dating that I plan on getting tatttooed more, I will smoke my cigars and continue to do the things that make me happy. Set expectations and let them know what I am about. Im in my mid-30's know and have experienced a lot, I know what I am about these days. So for me, it does not matter if they are tattooed or not, I care more about them being cool and having a good head on their shoulders. If a girl was covered in horrible tattoos, I may not be able to look past that.

[Deb Yarian]

I got married to a tattooist and started tattooing when I was 19. He was heavily tattooed.

I am now married to another tattooist who is even more heavily tattooed.

I had a brief thing with yet another heavily tattooed tattooist.

I think my tastes may be a bit skewed, but I am 50 now, and a heavily tattooed man is my standard for attractiveness.

If I was single I couldn't imagine looking outside of my "community" for companionship.

That's just what I find physically attractive and has nothing to do with whether I would like someone's personality though.

[AlannaCA]

Now that i think about it, all the dates i have gone on and the few reletionships i have entered into i have made sure that my partner was interested in tatoos or at least ok with it. i did this even when i didnt have any tattoos because i knew it would be part of my life at some point. i knew that if a common bond was not shared that the reletionship would not go anywhere.

[RockelMan]

When I started dating my wife she had no tattoos and I had only one at that time. She liked it and I did not mind that she had none. I did not mind if she wanted a full suit or not, it did not matter to me. She also was aware that I would be over time, getting many more and she was ok with that. Now I have a nice start to my collection of tattoos and she does as well. LOL its funny because we now get appointments booked for the same day by the same artist and make a day of it LOL. (I couldn't ask for better) :)

[gougetheeyes]

These are all really great and thoughtful responses.

Hogg, I'm right there with you, though I'm probably toeing the line between tattooed and heavily tattooed.

WeRn, you made the point better than me, about having sharing something that's a big part of your life. I'm not a tattooer myself, but it tends to take over sometimes and I can't imagine being with someone who doesn't understand or at least tolerate it.

Kenny, I like your perspective. I think you're dead on and if a girl has a good head on her shoulders like you said, of course she'd be the type you could share your passion for tattoos with.

[MsRad]

every guy i have had a fling or relationship with during the past 7 years has either been heavily tattooed or interested in being heavily tattooed...except Jackson. i mentioned this in another thread (i can't remember which one) where tattooing and masculinity were being compared, but Jackson is not heavily tattooed. in fact, he only has one tattoo, on his calf, and it is covered up most of the time. he's made record shopping more of a priority, and that's fine.

what is funny is that before Jackson and i clicked, i really never thought i could be attracted to another who was not heavily tattooed or did not desire to be. and now, that we've been dating for 2 years, i sort of don't feel that same attraction to guys who are heavily tattooed. it's not that i don't see myself being attracted to someone who is heavily tattooed, but i also don't think that it's a deciding factor anymore. as long as someone can accept the fact that i am becoming heavily tattooed, then that's all that matters. Jackson has expressed being attracted to my tattoos and me becoming heavily tattooed, and it's nice to hear that he likes it. i know we're kind of the odd couple on this, as it seems like there may be more heavily tattooed men dating lesser tattooed women, but this relationship has definitely changed me and my perspective on the subject (and it works out just fine for both of us).

[dari]

I also weighed in on the thread MsRad's referring to, with this-I now have a phobia of too much pink skin on men. I've just kind of gotten so accustomed to being around more heavily tattooed folk, if I see a dude walking down the street with his shirt off and he's all pink, kinda creeps me out. Or maybe it's just that dudes who insist on walking down the street shirtless creep me out? But the ones with no tattoos look like they're in some kind of lady suit, like the one the guy in Silence of the Lambs was making.

I do believe that we love who we love, and if it's really love, externals don't matter. What's most important to me is that someone is comfortable in their own skin, being true to themselves, and fully living the life they're meant to live. That being said, I'm really glad my husband hasn't held back regarding tattooing or anything else.

I was in a relationship with someone who wasn't tattooed, and he was a somewhat restrained individual. It was when I once picked him and his boss up at the airport in shorts, and he was freaked out because his boss, who already knew I was tattooed, could my tattoos on my calves. When he was sheepish and weird, and his boss was actually happier to see me then he was, I kinda knew it wasn't going to last. Not because I embarrassed him, but because I saw him for what he was, a coward. Of course there are always exceptions, but most heavily tattooed people aren't overly concerned with what mainstream society thinks of them, and they generally aren't cowards.

[gougetheeyes]

I also weighed in on the thread MsRad's referring to, with this-I now have a phobia of too much pink skin on men. I've just kind of gotten so accustomed to being around more heavily tattooed folk, if I see a dude walking down the street with his shirt off and he's all pink, kinda creeps me out. Or maybe it's just that dudes who insist on walking down the street shirtless creep me out? But the ones with no tattoos look like they're in some kind of lady suit, like the one the guy in Silence of the Lambs was making.

HAHAHAA LADY SUIT! You two both make great points. I'd obviously choose to be with an amazing person regardless of tattoos and, especially with what MsRad said, that seems to hold true for most others, too. As it obviously should. I just happened to luck out with both.

[deaddreamnation]

my girlfriend (going on 7 years!) has zero tattoos. when were first started dating and i was still in my apprenticeship she had a bunch of ideas for tattoos. i kept telling her to wait until i was better because i didn't want to be the one putting a bunch of poo all over her...so i think her need to get tattooed has waned, and now that i feel like i could pull off some cool shit, she is not interested...C'est la vie. i figure one of these days she'll come around to it again. So i guess my stance is a little skewed because she was and still is tattoo free. But she has always been extremely supportive of my career or whether i am getting more work done. I love that girl. And for those curious, yes i am going to propose soon. she keeps telling me that after 7 years it may be too late for her to say yes...haha...

but i would say if i was ever in the wild again, i don't think i would mind either way..tattooed or not, if ya got it, ya got it!

[jade1955]

When I met my wife over 36 years ago I had a couple of tattoos on my forearms and some hand poked tattoos on my hands which I was in the process I having removed. The ones I had on my hands had been done whilst I was in an Approved School in the UK (Reform School as our trans-Atlantic cousins call them. That was a time in my life I wanted to put behind me. My wife was never bothered by my tattoos and had one done while we were still going out on the top of her arm. I have had a few done since, she loves all of them and has had some important input into at least two of my tattoos, design wise. Last year I took the plunge and had a heart & swallow tattoo with my wifes name on it at the London Tattoo convention and when I showed it to her she said "I suppose I'll have to get one done, so a couple of months later she booked in with the same tattooer and had a lovely black and grey tattoo with my name underneath. This month she is going back to get another rose added underneath. So it can put a bit of a dent in the finances but worth every penny.

[briankelly]

two of the guys i work with have always said they hate tattooed women, while they are both very heavily tattooed. i am only moderately tattooed and always liked tattooed girls. now, we all have girl friends, both of their girlfriends have tattoos and are beginning tattooers themselves (as a complete side note, they met them while tattooing them, and how come only girls want to learn to tattoo now? every apprentice i have met in the last 2 or 3 years or every one asking for an apprenticeship, has been a girl) and i have a girlfriend who has no tattoos and who i hope never gets any tattoos. for me, i find it nice to not think that my girlfriend is into me because i am a tattooer and what she can get out of it.

[helsabot]

I have zero tattoos but am going to start soon, and I dated a guy for a while who had nearly a full body suit and worked at a shop. I'll admit it was a bit of an adjustment having never dated heavily-tattooed guys before, but his pieces were beautiful. We definitely drew some stares, though it was probably because I'm really short and he was preposterously tall. I loved hearing him talk about his love of ink, and it helped solidify my interest in getting a tattoo. My current boyfriend has one pretty minimal tattoo but lots of piercings - I guess I tend to be attracted to guys with modification of some sort despite being pretty boring myself in that regard.

[Perez]

My future wife only has 2 tattoos both of which I did on her, a set of black flag bars and a tiny simple heart and dagger. I hate tattooing her.

[Lochlan]

Here are some other tattoo related post:

Feminism & Tattoos

What tattoo designs can you never see enough of?

Tattoo Designs for Girls

What's your favorite tattoo on your body?

Tattoo Designs for Guys

[unlikeyourown]

this is indeed a fun topic. when my husband and i started dating i didnt have a drop of ink and he had one shoulder cap piece. Its been 6 years that we have been together, 2 of which we have been married, and all i can say is we can document different areas of our relationship by the pieces of art we have collected over the years. It in a sense has been something to bind us together.

My husband is not your typical looking tattoo collector, he is rather clean cut, and "square" from the outside perspective. haha. I know before now he never would have been like "hum when i grow up im going to be with a tattooed chick" but look at where we are now! I think your acceptance or the appeal of heavier tattooed people grows in accordance with your personal collecting.

[Huero]

I am a lifelong bachelor. I don't believe in monogamy and marriage. It makes no difference whatsoever to me if I dealing with a tattooed girl or not. I've been seeing a girl lately who is heavily tattooed, face, neck, hands, etc. But tattoos in and of themselves don't make a woman more attractive. An ugly girl with tattoos is still ugly.

I don't even notice tattoos anymore really. It's more unusual when someone doesn't have them.

What matters is how tolerant they are and open they are to that lifestyle. I was seeing a girl without a drop of tattoo on her, and I was getting heavily tattooed at the time, and she was cool with it. That's what matters. Openness.

[MsRad]

My future wife only has 2 tattoos both of which I did on her, a set of black flag bars and a tiny simple heart and dagger. I hate tattooing her.

Perez, why do you hate tattooing her?

[Louisgoodwin]

The only problem I have had is my wife to be as of July this year, wants every tattoo she sees tattooed at my shop lol.

Books her self in and nearly always gets canceled for paying costumers who want the appointments.

Tattoo lady's are a must, pinkies are just to normal for me.

I have had a few Helpers over the years and there pinkies have complained as the art has spread on to visible skin.

Tattooing your spouse can be like your dad teaching you to drive lol ....

[Tight-Lines]

I recently had a young lady make fun of the awesome eagle on my chest. She also said that people with tattoos just get them to make up for their lack of personality. I told her to get the fuck out of my apartment.

[gougetheeyes]

I recently had a young lady make fun of the awesome eagle on my chest. She also said that people with tattoos just get them to make up for their lack of personality. I told her to get the fuck out of my apartment.

The morning after can be awkward sometimes..

[Tight-Lines]

The morning after can be awkward sometimes..

Dude, this was during the initial event. Thats how mad I was.

After she walked out I listened to Blood For Blood and drank myself to death with good scotch.