Telling My Parents

[Jnvlv]

... like a long sleeve shirt? Wait. You don't own a long sleeve shirt?

LOL I do but RARELY wear them here in Phoenix, AZ

I meant a shirt that is MADE to end at the elbow, not a long sleeve, I guess kind of like a skater shirt?

I am checking the weather over there in Boston and I will probably bring long sleeves to wear, it looks cold-high 50 and 60s BRRRRRRRRRR

[Rightonkaleyross]

My parents were very upset when I started getting tattoos and got downright miserable when I didn't stop (lol). Everytime they bring up my tattoos I bring up the good things I do in my life for myself and for my community. It actually helps too when we are in public and strangers compliment my pieces.

[Faolan]

You could wait until they ask, because if they ask then they're kind of ready to know, it's like they are not afraid to ask so they probably aren't so afraid of the answer. hope that makes sense.

[idyllsend]

I just don't care anymore. The most disapproving people are my grandparents, and I think they basically got over it. Or realized there was no point in protesting. I used to do my best to hide them, but now I make no effort. If they see them, they seem, if not...then whatever.

[hellbunny]

My Mum knew about mine, before during and after the process, but I was always too scared to show my dad, I was convinced he would all but cut off my limbs, anyway I ended up ordering a couple (more like 10) pints on my younger brothers 18th birthday a week after I got my biggest, hardest to conceal piece, waited till the extended family left and then just told him.

He was cool with it, honesty is the best policy. :p

[PinkUnicorn]

I don't know about parents, but my sister was shocked (and we're both in our 50s!)

[idyllsend]

I just don't care anymore. The most disapproving people are my grandparents, and I think they basically got over it. Or realized there was no point in protesting. I used to do my best to hide them, but now I make no effort. If they see them, they seem, if not...then whatever.

So I guess I was wrong, they most definitely are not over it. I wore a dress to their house today and the first thing they both say to me 'what the hell is on your legs?' And then I had to listen to a slew of other judgey remarks/questions: 'How much did those cost?' 'They should pay you to put those on your skin.' 'You ruined your legs.' and so on. Mind you my grandparents are old school europeans, Nana from Wales and Grandpa from Italy, but I still let them know their opinions on my body are not valid and they can keep them to themselves :cool:.

[Aaron Fenn]

My parents are definitely not going to be impressed, they are both JW's and I'm not so they will definitely dissaprove and undoubtedly lecture me about how bad it is when I get a tatoo in the next few weeks. I'm going to get a couple of small ones on my legs so no one will see them when I'm wearing shorts etc. One day I might tell them, or they will find out when I get chest work done

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[Janna777]

I also love and respect my parents - I cried like a baby when I told them/ showed them my tattoo I was more upset than they where - with the love and respect you have for them - they also have for you I am sure it will blow over with time - just remind them your grown and you do love them and there opinion but it is still your life

[pidjones]

I'm 61. I wish like hell I still had them around to show them my new tattoo! Do it, accept any disapproval and understand their background. My mom would have loved them, and dad would have approved that they represent my service. My grandfather - who had his own - would have loved it!

[Robbie Kass]

if they are visible tattoos id let them know ahead of time so its less of a shock when they come see you.

[El Dolmago]

My mom came with in the shop with me for my first (25 odd years ago) - as my Aunt and Uncle got their tattoos as teenagers, on the streets of Mumbai, with a guy holding the batteries together with his feet, in 1969/70 - nothing I could do tattoo-wise would faze anyone in my family.

[exmember88]

Here is the issue I see, you say you paid for them with your own money but you also say your parents are still helping you out with some things, if they are still helping you out with some things that should mean you have almost no disposable income because otherwise you would put that money toward the things they are helping you out with. It's like saying you can't afford to pay your rent and then you go out to dinner every night, your landlord would get mad. If the money isn't he real issue here, and it's just that your parents hate tattoos, then you are just going to have to be an adult and say well I got them because I wanted them and it's my body, but hiding them is something a kid does not an adult. So decide weather or not you are an adult.

[pidjones]

Depends on what they are helping with. My mom helped us build our house. We help our two daughters occasionally - just gave the youngest (31) $150 for an exterminator to take care of a yellow jacket infestation at her house. We help the oldest (44) with medical bills. I still have the youngest on our family cell plan. She has made enough to own a home and car outright, but we still help sometimes. 'Cause we love them. I'd want to know about tattoos to make sure they get good ones safely. I'd also not expect to "loan" them money immediately before or after they paid for ink.

[Alice Ho Wing Ha]

Same problem here. My dad doesn't know I'm tattooed.

I got 2 tattoos and 1 is on my lap which is kinda obvious.

What I do is avoid wearing shorts at home and try not to let him know about my tattoos.

[jimstanley]

Surprised at how casually the money issue was discussed here... If I had been giving someone money for (things that I deemed) necessities like rent or school, and then I saw them cruising around town in a brand new car, or with a brand new tattoo... That's super disrespectful. It's like being in debt to a drug dealer and blowing all your money on other shit... you're gonna get hit...

If a person can afford this nonsense they should be able to afford everything else. Getting tattooed while still living under a financial security blanket is childish

[Hogrider]

If a person can afford this nonsense they should be able to afford everything else. Getting tattooed while still living under a financial security blanket is childish

Darn Right! And they shouldn't go to the movies, have a cell phone, computer, internet access, go to a bar, buy a magazine, buy a newspaper, or even a stick of gum either. Just bread and water!! This younger generation has gotten soft.

[Bobby Diebold]

When I was considering my first tattoo, my parents sat me down for "the talk." I was aspiring to be an actor way back then, and they were concerned that it would have a negative effect on my career (15 years later, and the idea of being a professional actor sends shivers up my spine...) I ended up getting a memorial tattoo for my older brother who had been killed... When I finally told my parents, I think they understood that the tattoo was simply my way of dealing with the loss and didn't have anything negative to say.

[kvaz]

It's definitely hard at first, and you already know how your mom will react so just prepare for it. It will however pass, because there could be worse things that you are doing and your parents will eventually get used to it, mine did! :)

[Margarita Yaschenko]

I have many tattoos but parents don't know about all of this. About some new tattoo i tell them about other - don't ) Just that once again they are not nervous. But they are used to the fact that I do it. over time, parents a relaxed view of tattoos. Anyway not have a tattoo removed, and they have reconciled with this fact :)

[ludlow]

The same with, i live with parents and my father doesnt know about 2 of them. I my opinion, he think that tattoo is an effect of mental issue.. something like when somebody cut themselves.. and he know better than me, why i did this art

[Shri Farah]

Your situation is very similar to mine recently. I also have three tattoos and just a couple weeks ago revealed them to my slightly elitist, strictly conformist mom. Since then she has been trying to explain to me why I am definitely going to regret this, why it looks so bad, how my future husband will not like it, how it'll be hard to hide at my wedding, bullshit like that. I just try to keep my cool and explain to her how insignificant these things are, what nonissues they are. It's tough because I know she will *never* understand or see eye to eye with me on why this is just who I am. The sooner you rip off the band aid, the easier it will be to get over the consequence. Or you could just hide em with clothing. I did that for months.

[annamageddon]

This thread has been very interesting. It makes me wonder if I should bother telling my dad that I have a tattoo. I'm totally independent so I don't feel that he'd have an issue there. He is older though so I know initially he'd have a negative or concerned reaction. However he's also reasonable, totally loves me, knows how hard I work and is very proud of that. Part of me just wants to tell him because he's not only my dad but one of my very best friends. The other part thinks that it's not worth the initial concern that he might have.

Just throwing in my personal experience.

[Spencer Jackson]

I recently had to tell my parents too as my tattoos have moved down my arm to the visible portion. It was definitely nerve wracking as I come from a very religious family. But although my parents weren't super excited about it. They were very accepting

[spacellama]

It's an interesting topic, especially because I'm preparing for the first tattoo. It's not big and it will be on the inner side of the right arm, but I think it will kinda shock them because of the image I think they have of me. My parents are cool with everything (my father is more of the 'make jokes and tell it's ugly' type). But my half-brother (first marriage of my dad) and his wife both have a lot of tattoos, and recently he started drawing for other people, so I think they will be cool with it.

I'm 19 years old and still live with them, but I work and will be using my personal money to do it, I think this is important, not because it's a tattoo, but because it's not an essencial thing, I think using their money would be the same as spending a lot of their money with chocolate, or games, or movies, or anything that's not essential and will affect only myself.

I already planned to tell them before I do it, one day before I'll tell my mother that I'll do it on the day after, explain that I'm using the money I got from work, to deal with her shock, because I think that if I do it and then just show up at home tattoed, they would be upset that I didn't even talked about it before (especially because they will be worried about me regreting, because they don't know there's almost a year that I'm planing on getting them).

It's a hard topic for people that come from religious houses, or people that have small-minded parents, I had the luck of having really nice ones.