Losing a Parent

[Androosh]

Lost my father today at 1:53 PM from Lewy Body Dementia. Wondering if anyone has any stories related to losing a parent, the funnier/more enlightening the better...anyone? Anyone?

My father was wheeled out as the pizza guy was coming in. Two ships passing in the night. Told the pizza guy his tip was "appreciate your father...." and he said "Mine died 2 weeks ago..." and we hugged. Anyone else? Anyone? Anyone?

[Natveggie45]

Just a huge hug for you. Lost my nana to this horrible disease. Toward the end, she was always convinced the nurses were stealing her underclothing. Kept buying her more.... She was quite a lady before that, strong and beautiful. Thats what i remember; do the same. After a while.... For now, go through what you need to go through. Big hug and bisoux ( thats kiss in french) to you and yours.

[Dan S]

My Pops was 82 and retired to Mountain Home, Arkansas. Calls me up and asks if I'm gonna visit them that summer, and I said, yeah, of course. Tells me I best to do it quick. Guy was 6'4, 250 pounds up into his sixties when the cancer hit, but by then, he was down to maybe 140, 160. Had "beat" the cancer, but had emphesyma.

My youngest son had just been born, he was like a month old, but we made plans and drove down-ten hour drive with four kids, including an infant. Fun.

Got there, everyone does the reunion trip with my 'rents, and my Pops, he sits in his rocking chair holding my month-old son, the one named after me. Sits with him for maybe an hour, we have a bite of lunch and a beer, and he sez "I don't feel so good, I'm gonna take a nap".

Went to sleep and died within the hour.

He was just waiting to meet the boy and to say goodbye to everyone-tough old fucker.

Maintain.

Edited July 17, 2012 by Dan S
sorry-couldn't see so good...

[Reyeslv]

Lost my father today at 1:53 PM from Lewy Body Dementia. Wondering if anyone has any stories related to losing a parent, the funnier/more enlightening the better...anyone? Anyone?

My father was wheeled out as the pizza guy was coming in. Two ships passing in the night. Told the pizza guy his tip was "appreciate your father...." and he said "Mine died 2 weeks ago..." and we hugged. Anyone else? Anyone? Anyone?

First, my condolences to you and your family.

I lost my Mother back in January. She had a great run and was an extremely strong woman. A couple of nights before she passed, she told me that she was ready to go. Asking for my permission, I told her that if she needed to go that she should. I never left the hospital that day or night. The night was really tough for her, I was told by the doctors and nurses that she will be gone any minute. She was an extremely strong person and she fought all night long. Well she made it through that night and when I woke up her eyes were open and she was coherent. I said "HOLLY SHIT!" and she responded "What?, What happened last night? I don't remember anything." I said "Ma, we almost lost you all the doctors were here saying this is it but you held on. To that she responded DAMN IT! and slapped her hand on her leg...... I had to laugh, and she gave me an annoyed look....

[CultExciter]

@Androosh, i am so very sorry for your loss. i haven't lost my parents, but i've lost grandparents, and so many friends. there is no good advice, and i am sitting here feeling for you man. take care of yourself and your family.

the one buddhist mantra that always reminds me of the impermanence of life is this: "all that is mine, beloved and pleasing, will become otherwise."

thinking of you and yours.

[reverend1]

We lost my mother-in-law to pancreatic cancer two years ago. She was only 58. My wife struggles with the lose of her mother everyday. It has gotten easier for her, but she is not the same person anymore. My deepest condolences to you and your family.

[Androosh]

Internet strangers are awesome. I was in deep on a bottle of Johnny Walker Black last night when I started the thread...woke up with an "oh-shit-what-did-I-do?" feeling. But it is nice to read these entries. I hope more people post their own experiences.

There have been a thousand little triumphs to come from this one tragedy, but to keep it relevant to LST: I got to check out two of my Uncle's old tattoos. I had never seen them before, as he lives in New Hampshire and we don't get to see each other very often. We were having a BBQ on Saturday and I notice a faded hummingbird on his forearm from about 30 feet away. I'm like "Uncle Mike, can I ask you about that hummingbird?". He thought I was rustling his jimmies because his siblings and coworkers have given him so much shit over the years for this old tattoo. I assured him that I'm an enthusiast/collector/whatever and he eased up told me that it was done while he was in the Navy and stationed in San Diego, and that it would have been done in 1973 in a shop on Broadway. He then showed me another one on his bicep - a sweet old rose with an eagle above it, all of it framed by a daisy chain design. That one was also done in SD around 1973.

"I don't remember who, just picked it off the wall and gave the guy $20...we were just into doing stupid shit back then". He was pretty amused that I took such interest in them and he told me that nobodyhad ever paid him any compliments on them.

I was trying to remember if Hardy was around San Diego back then. Can someone shed some light on tattooers who were around San Diego back then? I know there were a ton of 'em.

[Scott R]

my dad lost both his parents within 16 days late last year. He also lost his brother to a freak horse riding incident, He focuses on his grandchildren to help ease the grief. My wife gave birth to a stillborn son on june 28th and its the most unatural process to pick out mini coffin when you should be changing diapers. Guess what I am saying is that we are suppose to bury our parents, not parents bury their children. He felt like he succeded in life just that you were there

[Iwar]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss @Androosh

I can't relate as I still have both my parents, but you have my deepest condolences.

Great story about your uncle by the way.

[Mr. Smith]

I'm so sorry, man. I truly wish you and your whole family all the best.

[RoryQ]

My Dad died when I was 23. He was just turning 60. Sudden heart attack, which was annoying because he didn't drink or smoke and had been improving his diet and whatnot.

The main things that made it easier to bear were the fact that we had never fallen out (in fact, we were getting on better and better the older I got) and the fact that I got to see him about a week beforehand. He'd called up to Dublin with my Mum quite randomly. I can still remember shaking hands with him at the end of that visit.

It's a hell of a thing to lose a parent. Really you might think you're doing OK one day, then the next you feel the opposite. The passage of time helps though... I think...

So best of luck, and sorry to hear of your loss.

[Kev]

Condolences on your loss, man.

[TrixieFaux]

Sorry to read of your loss @Androosh.

[PhilB]

Sorry to hear that, @Androosh.

Lost my dad when he was 48 in the 80s, and my mom just passed a year and a half ago after her almost 3 year battle with cancer.

[Androosh]

@RoryQ - 23 man, that must've been a real motherf*cker.

[Duffa]

Hey @Androosh like other have said, my thoughts are with you and your family. Never know what to say at times like this, but sometimes shit just don't need to be said. Take care my friend. (And the story with your Uncle is awesome, great way to bond with him)

[Androosh]

And the story with your Uncle is awesome, great way to bond with him

Thanks man. Yeah, it was a great way to bond with a guy I never get to see. I had to explain LST to him a few times - "There is this virtual community I visit and trust me, these people would lose their shit over these 'mistakes' you made in 1973..."

[Duffa]

Any chance we can get photos of said 'mistakes'?

[ILikePie]

Sorry for your loss I know it's hard but it does get easier everyday as you except the loss and move forward.

I lost my Dad 2 years ago and I still miss him everyday but know its part of the cycle of life.. I got a nice tattoo as a memorial to him and you know a tattoo fixes everything.

[PhilB]

Good point. My squidpants started as a memorial to my mom.

[Abellve]

PM on its way. I typed and typed and realized I'm not that public...but I'm not so private I can't relate. My sincerest sympathies.

[Androosh]

Any chance we can get photos of said 'mistakes'?

I'm such a gump, I totally fumbled this part of it. The request has been sent for his "mistakes" to be photographed. Stand by,

In all honesty, my Uncle's tattoos were the first "vintage" tattoos I've really seen in person since I started my serious tattoo obsession/education here on LST. Seeing them up close was like having a goddamn lighting bolt hit me dead in the skull. Whoever did them got it right. They ring true to this day.

[Duffa]

@Androosh - LST is standing by ;)

In saying that dude, it's possibly the last thing that should be on your mind! However, it does mean you'll be in contact more with your Uncle and after your description of the 'mistakes' I'm even more keen to see them!

[ShawnPorter]

I lost my mother two years ago (this month) and I tell you... It's something that I've learned to deal with but am not really the same after.

My Mom was a spitfire- 5'1" of Southern Baptist with a heart of gold. When I was a teenager she rewarded me for graduating early by lying to a tattooer (said I was 17 instead of 15) to get my first tattoo. Over the years she supported me in my endeavors no matter how strange, and was my biggest cheerleader.

I am who I am because my mother was who she was; little mannerisms or phrases, values she instilled in me carving out the adult I've become. I miss being able to talk to her, but years of her advice and her guiding me towards the right decisions have paid off and I'm stronger because of her. Mourn your Dad, but let his memory ease your burden.

My condolences to you and your family right now.

[Colored Guy]

I lost my mother two years ago (this month) and I tell you... It's something that I've learned to deal with but am not really the same after.

My Mom was a spitfire- 5'1" of Southern Baptist with a heart of gold. When I was a teenager she rewarded me for graduating early by lying to a tattooer (said I was 17 instead of 15) to get my first tattoo. Over the years she supported me in my endeavors no matter how strange, and was my biggest cheerleader.

I am who I am because my mother was who she was; little mannerisms or phrases, values she instilled in me carving out the adult I've become. I miss being able to talk to her, but years of her advice and her guiding me towards the right decisions have paid off and I'm stronger because of her. Mourn your Dad, but let his memory ease your burden.

My condolences to you and your family right now.

Your mom sounded like mine. Totally there for everyone. Unfortunately she left us when I was 23 and she was 51. Not a good thing, but the experience has numbed me for anyone in my life that has since died. "Uncle so and so died yesterday". Yeah.. what time are the Yankees on...

CG